Badly I just wanna spent more time with him
Jay-Z has always commented about his father in his songs. After he abandoned him at age eleven, Jay was left wondering where his father was and why he left his mother Gloria.
That wonder soon turned into hatred and as Jay told Howard Stern, caused him to “build up a wall” against his father.
“Your father, growing up, is like Superman to you, he’s everything, so once you feel that sort of hurt, you never allow yourself to get close to that feeling. You don’t even wanna feel that good because you know the flip-side of that. You don’t let people get that close so they won’t hurt you.”
His despair and pain in his songs is reflective of a son that just wants to have a father.
“I would thirst often as a youth cause of you the person
Moms nursin self-esteem issues
Round the house it’s hard to find a clean tissue, minus her tears
To rewind this time I promise I minused my years.”
It wasn’t until shortly before his fathers death that they were able to reconcile their differences. Jay actually attributes the success of his marriage with Beyonce to his father abandoning him.
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