[Russell Simmons]
Hold up, hold up
Before we get started I want everybody to know
My name is Russell Rush
And I come to blaze the cold rock stuff
I got my man the doctor doctor. How you feel, doctor?
Doctor Jeckyll's in the house, doctor, doctor
Here we go now, let's go

Jazzy Jay's in the place
Everybody look here, to the left side
Y'all niggas clap your hands like this here, dig this, dig this
Clap, clap, clap, c'mon, c'mon
Clap, clap your hands
Now on the right side, y'all do the same stuff
Like, y'all just clap on beat with the people on the left side
And everything'll be funky
Now dig this
Doctor, you ready to get funky?
Jazzy Jay, you ready to kick it? Let's go!

My homeboy Rick Rubin produced the record. This is a Def Jam
This the b-side to a record that's called "Def Jam"
And it's so def that we call it a def jam
So def that it's the def jam

Now, I ain't never sung before. I'm a manager
I like to manage lots of groups
Everybody talk on records
They talk on records that they come from Rush, and we gon' crush
Right about now, people on the left side, on the right side
Y'all still clapping now
And people in the middle, y'all lift up your legs
Both legs, with both hands, and wiggle them in the air like this here
You see me doing this? Can you do it?
You lying, y'all all lying
Now look here, if you can't wiggle both legs, man
Wiggle one leg in the air, and let's all get funky
We gon' get funky on the count of four now. Four!

Now Jazzy, I want Jazzy you to do something real funky right now
I want you to scratch the record, Jazzy, c'mon
Now scratch the record, Jazzy
That sounds kind good. Hey Rick, what do ya think?
Should we keep this? If we keep this, it's gonna save us a lot of money
'Cause we ain't gotta hire nobody to say nothing
And we can keep all the money
Jazzy Jay

Look here, everybody have a good time
C'mon y'all, let's make it funky
Doctor, how you feeling? You alright, Doctor?
Hey Doctor, man, you think I'm probably gonna rap on this record?
Three-piece suit and a button-down shirt?
Lookit here Rick, let's go to the bridge, c'mon

One -- c'mon, I'm gonna count it off now
One, four
At the count of six, we'll do something funky
C'mon everybody in the place, on six, alright
Y'all get ready
Simon says six, it's six
Simmons says six, and it's funky
Kids, you can front if you want to
That's that pretty girl, Sarah Lee -- she's kinda def
She could be with the Def Jam
Hey little girl, c'mon, let's go swing a little something
Alright for a couple minutes, you know what I'm saying?
Hey look, it's no time to front now
We gon' swing with the Rush now
Don't be trying to front
Look here, I got a six year old outside with the champagne
Don't be fronting on me now cause
The bubbles out there
We'll go to the hotel, do the wildest wild thing
And you can hang out with the Rush
And get with this Def Jam
And I'm gonna give you some of this def jam, too
I got about two more minutes
And when that two minutes is up, me and you gon' shoot to the hotel
And do the wildest thing
Alright, so look here
People in L.A., y'all might as well get with this
'Cause y'all can't front cause it's from New York and it's def
And y'all with the Rush, and y'all rolling
Now c'mon, on four let's go, c'mon everybody now, c'mon now
Four!

Yeah, that was on beat, doc
That was on beat that time
Alright Doctor
In fact, you can't rap on this record
You got a record company that'll sue me if you get on my record
You know what I'm saying?
I wanna have Run on the record, and Kurtis Blow and Whodini
And LL Cool J and everybody
But they'd sue me, man
So I'll just rap myself, keep all the money
Me and Rick gon' keep
Look at Rick laughing -- gonna keep ALL the money
Let's go!