Feelings I felt, keeling myself
“Keeling myself” is a homophone for “killing myself.”
He’s upset that he didn’t help the people that needed it.
The feelings are breaking him down and he’s emotionally killing himself.
It’s also a piece of nautical wordplay. By “keeling himself” he is righting himself and finding his proper direction. In a boat, the keel serves as the main structural support, keeps the vessel from capsizing, and converts leeward motion into forward momentum. While “keeling myself” is supposed to invoke the imagery of “killing myself”, what is actually being insinuated is that by finding his own path in the moment, ‘Bino is killing his old self. The line turns out to be much deeper under the surface (pun intended).
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