How can I find happiness when I can’t remember it's lost
I do so many temporary things
To smile for just a minute

from Crooked I (Ft. Slaughterhouse) – Monsters In My Head Lyrics on Rap Genius

Meaning

His happiness is lost but this fact is always forgotten, so he’ll never go looking for it because he is under the influence of these “monsters”.

Joell’s referring to using drugs or alcohol as a quick fix, but it doesn’t last.

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