Yup there goes me right there in black
Holdin' hands, not starin' back
She starts cryin' I start denying, its my fault
And I'm aware of that
So much going on in these few lines:
As the previous line suggests, Jay is having a flashback to a time when his partner confronted him about the behavior he explains throughout this verse.
“There goes me right there in black” — This is a flashback, so visually the scene looks black and white. Jay colors himself “black”/dark because, as he is about to explain, he is the one at fault in this scene.
“Holdin' hands not starin' back” (this is the lyric as officially listed on thisisjayelectronica.com) — While their held hands would suggest a warm relationship, Jay can’t even look straight at his girl because he is consumed by the “one irrelevant thought that started out as a spark…”, meaning his paranoia and jealously are tearing the relationship apart.
“She starts cryin' I start denying that it’s my fault…” — Jay’s girl acknowledges the pain his behavior is causing, but he’s too self-absorbed to notice it.
“…and I’m aware of that/Man, in hindsight signs be glarin' back” — Reflecting back on this entire situation now, Jay can see the error of his ways and that he was severely out of touch with reality at the time of the flashback.
Jay beautifully summarizes his failed relationship in a few lines. And that’s why we all love him…
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