Bo Burnham – New Math Lyrics

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Whats a pirate minus the ship? just a creative homeless guy
And an anteater plus a large hungry mutant ant? An ironic way to die
And whats domain, domain, range: a kid with too much in his pants
And two balls minus one, six titles at the tour de france

Split a decision with long division
Take the circumference of your circumcision
Live like your data and when you're all set
Put it all together and whatever you get

Is new math...

Whats a bag of chips divided by five, that's a Nike worker's meal
And Santa clause multiplied by "i" well I guess that makes him real
And the square root of the NBA is Africa in a box
How do u trace a scatter plot? Give the pencil to Michael J Fox

Take the approximate moral proportion of the probable problem of a pro-life abortion
Live like your data, and when you're all set
Put it all together and whatever you get...

Is new math

And if you made a factor tree of the factors that caused my girl to leave me you'd have a tree...
Full of Asian porn

C-A-L see you later mathematical minds make industrial smog
And whats the opposite of lnx, duraflame the unnatural log

Support the farmers with a pro-tractor
Link Kennedy and Lincoln with a common fact, or
Live like your data...blah blah

Word problems

If there's a fat guy in a pastry shop with a twenty dollar bill and he's ready to buy
In order to predict his volume change you need to know the value of pie

And there's a metal train that a mile long and at the very back end a lightning bolt struck her
How long til it reaches and kills the driver, provided that he's a good conductor

And if ten percent of men are gay and twenty percent of men are Chinese, what are the odds that a men chosen at random spends his free time and mealtime while on his knees
And if Kim is half as old as Bobby who is two years older then twelve year old Tori
For how many more 30 day months will their threesomes be considered statutory rape


Cause having sex is like quadratic expansion if it can't be split then its time to stop
And having sex is like doing fractions, its improper for the larger one to be on top
And having sex is like math homework, I do it best when I'm alone in my bed
And squaring numbers are just like women, if they're under thirteen just do them in your head....

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