[Intro :Andy Milonakis]
Oh my God, that's him, that's him, that's Dirt Nasty
Oh my Gosh, go ask him
No you ask him, no you!
But I'm scared
Okay, hey Dirt Nasty
I-I asked my mom, where babies come from, and she says a stork bring them down from heaven, is that true?

[Verse 1: Dirt Nasty]
Well let me break it down for you kid
Ain't no stork done dropped off shit (what?)
Ain't no Santa, no Easter Bunny, no tooth fairy and bitches want money
See your mom gave dad some head, he shoulda pulled out and nutted on the bed
Instead, nine months later, you plopped out your moms fat ass during labor (hehe)
But mommy was a player, you might be your dads but you prolly your neighbor's
Came out all sloppy and shit, crying like a bitch, suckin' her tits
See that's what God intended, but Lord have mercy the twat's infected (what's a twat?)
As the doc cut the umbilical he saw your cock and said fuck you're pitiful
Now here you are seven years later and your dick ain't grown a fucking centimeter (that's true)
How can I teach you profilactic, just stick the plan with your tiny little fat dick

[Hook]
Let me teach you the birds and the bees, it's kindda easy like A B C
If you feel like it burns when you pee, put a rubber on your dick for the STD (that's right)
Let me teach you the birds and the bees (stupid), public service from Dirt Nasty (dumb shit)
See that little red dot on your meat? Put a rubber on your dick then act like me
Doggy style, that's the shit, girl on top, squeeze her tit, missionary, nah thats lame, choke a bitch, what's my name? (Dirt Nasty)

[Andy Milonakis]
Hey my brother showed me a weird slimy balloon that he says protects him from diseases, what's a diseases?

[Verse 2: Dirt Nasty]
Alright here we go (ladies and gentlemen)
Alright kid, hold this beer, let me make this crystal-fucking-clear
I don't know if they make baby trojans, but if they do pull it down to the scrotum
Ever seen dad, scratch real bad, it ain't poison-oak, they call it the crabs
Ever seen sis, hiss when she piss, clenching the fist, that's syphilis
And when mommy make doc appointments, it ain't the flu, she need vajayjay-ointments
And don't go sharing slurpies, 'cuz little Karen is carrying herpes
Dick hurt? Burn when you pee? Then put a Jimmy on your little wee-wee
Better wrap that rascal, especially if you put it in a chick asshole
Don't trust no ho, and if the pinky's stinky, run for the backdoor
When the cooch is loose, that means she's a slut, you silly goose
Pussy tight? Hit it like a champ, oh yeah, watch out for the tramp-stamp
The bitches disease, so beware the wrath of the wizard sleeve

[Hook]

[Outro]
[Dirt Nasty]
Now I hope you kids learned a valuable lesson, now excuse I gotta go to the clinic
[Andy Milonakis]
Oh, I get it now, babies come out of girls pussy holes (yes), and your should always use condoms (mmh, maybe)
Vaginas are stinking dirty filthy germicidal fuckholes filled with poss and ooze (you've been listening)
Thanks Dirty Nasty, I really learned something today, now that I know about the birds and the bees I'm gonna go get my dick sucked
[Dirt Nasty]
Alright you kids get some head