JayComplex

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The song was not meant to force her to speak to me or convince her to want to be with me. It was simply me expressing myself the only way I know how, through music.

And despite the fact that I’ve been hurt several times, I keep going back for more…like a bad kid that’s always in detention or being punished for the same pranks and classroom disruptions.

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It’s not a mystery that I derive inspiration and creativity from pain, because I consider myself an artist and my life seems to be in a cliche “starving artist” phase.

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I wrote the first 2 verses prior to splitting up with this lady…and was only able to write the third verse after we separated, because I get a great deal of inspiration from pain and heartache.

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I’m pleading with her to simply say what it is that she wants, just so that I can give it to her. As I ponder, I’m usually under the influence of a substance trying to think or relax despite the fact that I can’t convince her to be with me.

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I do all these things, and still there is something stopping her from giving herself to me fully.

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Telling her to speak to me as much as possible and as often as possible as if each time would be our last time speaking to one another.

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My big plans for the future involve having enough resources to be able to take her anywhere in the world (just like a passport).

As well as I can take her to places that aren’t physical…as in, new plains of emotion, life, and happiness.

But the choice is hers…

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I don’t want her to be with me just because I want to be with her, or because I do nice things or treat her well…I want her to be with me because she can’t live without me…similar the way you can’t travel without your passport.

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Even while in the raging heat of the summer season in the Bahamas, she still keeps her cool with her demeanor and stays stylish.

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I’m asking for the wind to blow her dress up just so I can re-enact the air vent scene of Marilyn Munroe with her.

Marilyn Monroe was also known for having sung happy birthday to former president John F. Kennedy…in comparison, I am trying to become the president of my own music business one day.

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