Dreaming (The Breakthrough)

Produced by

“Dreaming” is a track meant to both catch listeners up to where I’ve been mentally and such since the release of #SongsFor817. It’s also a track that’s reflective and meant… Read More

Aug. 17, 20141 viewer

Dreaming (The Breakthrough) Lyrics

[Verse One: Speed on the Beat]
A'yo, my first outburst, it was a gift and a curse
Didn't know it at first, no one understood the hurt
That I'd felt inside, not knowing any of it at the time
When I punched the glass window, threatened to kirk
Reckless behavior, nobody controlling me
Teachers scold me, girls loved me but they always consoling me
Not knowing what was truly going on in my mind
So I ended up proving them hella right
And I resorted to it, one time, me and my moms were homeless
I was focused on trying to get us out this abyss
Eight or nine or ten or something, they thought that I was bugging
So they tried to fly in not expecting that I was in Hell already...
So, hell...dammit, I was ready
To end all their endeavors before they pulled the piece!
Not truly understanding what was going on in my mind
The doctors told me I had a problem but I'd know in due time

[Hook: Speed on the Beat]
I was dreaming...
Thinking everything's alright when the world is sinking...
Drugging out day and night, plotting and scheming...
Even if reality's full of strife, I can't be caught dreaming
I'll get out of this hell myself, I don't wanna be dreaming...

[Verse Two: Speed on the Beat]
Fast Forward to Roland Park, back when I met True
They knew I was an a-plus student, but stupid they couldn't prove
Anything was wrong. They thought I was a problem child
Wanted to put me in DEC classes, they were pretty through...
Trying to understand the macabre scenes in the dreams
Already had Matt try to kill himself, they gave no fucks 'bout me
I was black, short and fat, and I tried to fuck Savvy
Sadly couldn't see myself ever truly being happy
That's recklessness, impulsiveness, self-destructive behavior
Suicide attempts, depression and hyperness in my capers
But they didn't see it until I was about twenty
(But they didn't see it until I was about twenty)
My dad's dying, I started dating Raquel
I started to let go, but there were still hella skel-
E-tons in my closet, and son I almost lost it
Hobbling across the parking lot to traffic I almost threw
Myself into Route One, praying I'd end it all
Drowned sorrows in alcohol, but nothing could kill the stewed
Up feelings in my head, all driving to my bed
Of death I almost went, but I decided to seek the truth

[Hook]
Because I was dreaming...
Thinking everything's alright when the world is sinking...
Drugging out day and night, plotting and scheming...
Even if reality's full of strife, I can't be caught dreaming
I'll get out of this hell myself...

[Verse Three: Speed on the Beat]
Mr. Speed you're bipolar and that honestly kinda shocked me
I said fuck your rules and expectations, don't try to lock me
I got another set of eye, more aligned with what I wanted to do
Fast forward to a little after I turn 22
Plus three holes in the walls...
My two-year-old son scared to come through
My path, we break up again, no demons forced me
Tore the skin of the boring me lost myself in my stories
Abusing medications, Klonnies push me off the cliff
"I'll just enjoy the ride," started drifting into "consciousness."
The next thing I know, I'm chilling in Laurel Regional
"Mr. Speed, will you admit yourself?" Whatever yo
The on-call doctor said "we think you've BD"
"On the one side of the spectrum, a classic case won't you agree?"
So here I am, one of the youngest in this thing, and see
Missing out on classes and dealing with foolishness (HELP ME!)
But, ultimately, owning up helped me once before
So before I left out the door I let some of it into my soul
Began feeling weights lifted off my shoulders and
Everyone around me said I seemed like "me" again--Revived Soul

About

“Dreaming” is a track meant to both catch listeners up to where I’ve been mentally and such since the release of #SongsFor817. It’s also a track that’s reflective and meant to, as I always do, lay my heart and life on the line. As mentioned before, I am a person who is “bipolar.” This track was written around the time I first accepted that fact, in a hospital room in Laurel. So, very timely.

After writing the track, I decided to kill off the proto-version of DOTK, an album titled “Unhinged,” and just put everything out there.

Death of The King releases Sunday August 17th 2014.

The track also features a better, more crisp mixdown when compared to the (intentional) no-fi days of…last year and stuff. Thank Luke from @FGN-Records for that as even a couple convos has helped me to mix my tracks down a bit better, making them less unintentionally “no-fi.”