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A not-too-subtle shout to the same level of imaginary friends that populated Kurt Cobain’s head in Nirvana’s “Lithium

“I’m so happy
‘Cause today I found my friends
They’re in my head”

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The day John Mayer hits his maturity point will be heralded as a second coming. With his many relationship issues, personal struggles, and bad habits, Mayer has been the posterboy for rebel…singer songwriters. 2013’s Paradise Valley seems to finally hint that the late 90s lost boy has finally become a man. With a blanket.

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John’s maturity has finally reached a point where he does not actively attempt to ruin others' relationships. Huzzah. Even still, if he were to find Olivia knocking at his door, he is not strong enough to send her home.

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The man. The legend. The movie character. You know him as Michael Jordan. We know him as #23.

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The John R. Wooden Award is given to the superior college player of the year, a particularly tough title to grab, given Jordan’s world class competitors. Still, the legend’s dominant junior year season, his last before the NBA, was enough to win both the Wooden and Naismith awards.

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Jordan’s contributions to the Wizards were short lived – he came out of a second retirement for two seasons. Despite his reputation as an impossible person to be around, Jordan’s aims in the two seasons were surprisingly honorable: his entire salary went to 9/11 relief funds. Jordan led the team in the 2001-2002 season, but due to a number of injuries, was forced to retire midway through the 2002 season to an uproarious cheer of “we want Mike!”

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u2jtUewnfA4

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Jordan’s retirement appeared not to affect his three point game. In 17 games, he managed to hold a .801 percentage, comparable to his previous seasons. While still rusty, he delivered in the clutch and scored 55 points on a March 28, 1995 game.

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Why so low? Jordan, deciding on a while to come save the struggling 31-31 Bulls, came out of retirement mid-season! The resulting boost lifted the Bulls to the Playoffs, where they lost in the Semifinals. Part of the reason was an amazing strip of Jordan by the Magic’s Nick Anderson.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v8obFe26x5c

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The year of Jordan’s famous return from retirement memo, consisting of two words:

“I’m back.”

Despite only a one year absence, his mid-season return was an absolute uproar.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n1LeVCwyHas

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Much like “Slow Dancing In A Burning Room,” a declining relationship is a slaughterhouse. The “dead on arrival” scene is the only outcome when all other avenues have been exhausted. Grohl and love are going down, with only the slightly funny nod to “shame” to give them peace.

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