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Shirt – Ben Sherman
This is a vintage (I don’t know what vintage means lol) Beatles shirt that I picked up from the thrift store a few years ago. It was seriously labeled “gay men’s shirt.” I guess they just didn’t know that straight men could rock such a flamboyant shirt when coupled with the right accessories. I forgive them for their sins.

Here’s a close-up so you can more clearly see Paul, John, George, and Ringo:

Pants – Compression shorts WITH athletic cup
Something that you wouldn’t understand unless you wore this shirt in public is… women flock to you. Literally by the dozens. It became such a problem that I had to start wearing the cup to protect myself. I guess that’s the price you pay for style.

Hat – Pith Helmet
Again, when I wear this shirt, I need extra protection from the hordes of women that it attracts. This pith helmet, often used by explorers, has a hard outer shell that protects me to some degree from attempted make-out seshes.

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Unreviewed Annotation 1 Contributor ?

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Baylor’s stellar performance on Sunday had their fans like:

Heading into the game, analysts were concerned that Creighton just didn’t have the size to be able to compete with a big Baylor squad. It turns out they were right. Anchored by their 7'1" center Isaiah Austin, the suffocating Bears defense shut down the dynamic Creighton offense, led by the nation’s leading scorer Doug McDermott.

Baylor held McDermott, who averaged 27 points per game during the regular season, to just 15 hard-earned points. He finished his distinguished career in 5th place on the all-time NCAA scoring standings with 3,150 points.

In a flat-out destruction, Baylor had five players score in double-digits, while as a team shooting over 63%. They built a 20 point lead by halftime and never looked back.

And then they messed up Craig Sager’s hair.

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Virginia dominated the game from start to finish, booking their ticket to the Sweet Sixteen. Nothing Memphis tried seemed to work, as Virginia imposed their will on the Tigers at both ends of the court.

The Cavaliers held Memphis to 17 points below their season average while cleaning up on the boards, out-rebounding the Tigers 40-28. Their 56% shooting didn’t hurt either.

The ACC is going to have a different team representing them this year. Instead of the normal Duke or North Carolina teams making deep runs, the Virginia Cavaliers look like the team to beat, at least from the East, after the first weekend.

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For the second year in a row, the Crimson have won a game in the NCAA Tournament.

Their tough defense shut down one of the best scorers in the country in Sean Kilpatrick, limiting him to only 18 points. Their well-balanced offense in which all five starters averaged double-digit scoring during the regular season did the rest.

This comes after last year’s 14th ranked Harvard team upset New Mexico in the first round. These wins make you wonder if Harvard should really continue to be seeded so low. Cincinnati coach Mick Cronin certainly didn’t think that this was a real “upset.”

In my mind, today’s game was anything but an upset. They’ve got a great team. Tough draw for us. In my opinion, they’re one of the best teams we played all year.

Alum Jeremy Lin knew what this win really meant to a lot of people though:

https://twitter.com/JLin7/status/446748978034380800

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My take on the “suburban mother of three (ages 4, 6 ½, and 8) goes to Disney World.”

Fanny Packs – TWO
Are you ever wearing a single fanny pack and realize that you just can’t fit all your stuff in it? Well I don’t have that problem with my double whammy. I can fit three water bottles, two bottles of sunscreen (sweatproof and waterproof), two pairs of goggles, tissues, band-aids, and some fruit snacks in those bad boys. Laugh all you want but when the shit hits the fan, I’m the one who is prepared.

Shirt – American flag

Visor – Washington Nationals
Can’t forget about my favorite baseball team! Go Nats!

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This interaction implies that this exact situation has happened before, perhaps multiple times. One must wonder how many of Richard’s (Spades’s) coats Tommy had ripped before this incident.

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Chris Farley was a large man. Too large to fit into David Spade’s sport coat. OR IS HE????

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Unreviewed Annotation 1 Contributor ?

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Damn I look good. This is a fit that I probably rocked back in 1998.

Shirt – Taz Hockey Jersey
This used to be my favorite shirt for obvious reasons. It’s sweet as fuck. It still is. I wore this at my 7th birthday party. I’m also wearing it now at age 23. Nappy: 1 – Aging: 0

Shorts – Short shorts
You can clearly see a slight moose knuckle. That’s because not only am I wearing shorts that are far too short, but I also rolled up the waistband three times to show more glorious thigh. I once squatted 315 pounds. Full squat. Past 90 degrees. I really did. Ponder that while you stare. Perverts…

Hat – Latino
It reads: “LIGA JUVENIL LATINO AMERICANA: SPORTS VS SMOKING” I don’t speak any Spanish, but I’m pretty sure that means that there was a sports league that tried to prevent Latino children from smoking. And that is an effort that I am very proud to support.

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A typical work outfit for me.

Jersey – Damon Stoudamire

Stoudamire was the 7th overall pick in the 1996 NBA draft, and went on to win the Rookie of the Year award. He also won the award for coolest fucking jersey ever. There’s an actual dinosaur on it. If you think a better jersey has ever existed, then you would be mistaken. Also, DRAKE WORE IT!

Outer jacket-like thing – The Army
It’s camo, therefore I can blend into any situation. Which would normally be possible except for the fact that I’m also wearing THESE PANTS!!!!!!!

Pants – Sag Harbor
These are also women’s pants. You can tell because the button to fasten them is on the opposite side. Like, the button is on the left and the hole is on the right. How weird is that, right? You can also tell they are meant for women because they are an obnoxiously bright shade of turquoise that no male other than me can rock properly.

Hat – African Kufi
It really accentuates the perfect shape of my head. This type of hat is usually worn by elders or family patriarchs. I wear one because it makes people respect me. RESPECT ME!

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Jean jacket, jeans, (women’s) leather vest, and a rice hat. The perfect outfit to wear to a black tie event or an Asian rodeo.

Jean Jacket – Marlboro

Yeah. Marlboro makes jean jackets. I SHIT YOU NOT this bad boy had a Surgeon General’s Warning tag on it. As if I was going to literally smoke the thing.

Jeans – Lucky Brand
Who cares. They make my legs look real noice.

Leather Vest – Kathy Ireland
Yeah, it’s meant for women. But men can also wear it because this is 2014 and fuck gender stereotypes. (Also it has a nice silky inner lining that feels nice). : ^ ]

Rice Hat – I don’t know
Honestly cowboys should have worn these instead of cowboy hats. Look at the 360 degrees of shade it provides. A huge improvement over the primitive cowboy hat.

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