for the final project in my death class,
we got to write an essay
about whatever we wanted.
i, naturally, chose suicide in artists.

virginia woolf ended up being
the centerpiece for the essay,
lots of time researching her.
no surprise that she’d reemerge.

i had an acting class the following semester
and for me and my partner’s final scene,
we were given an excerpt from
who’s afraid of virginia woolf?
serendipity.

see also:

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this song is eighteen minutes of me
trying as hard as i fucking can
to say something no one has said,
to do something no one has done.

i don’t know what to do
in the face of extinction.
the best i’ve got is that

everything anyone
has ever tried
was not enough.

being anyone
who has already been
is not enough.

failing to individualize yourself
is not only a tragic personal disservice;
it’s preventing humanity’s evolution.

forcing old solutions into new problems,
failing to synthesize and reimagine
is a recipe for collapse
cooked many times before.

if there’s any chance of avoiding that,
it would take conversation, debate,
success, failure, triumph, tragedy.
but before anything, it demands risk,
that someone take that chance at all.

you don’t have to care about this.
you don’t have to care about anything.
i don’t have to care about ultra.

i do anyway.
i write anyway.
i create and hope and live
in spite of it all.

and if my living intentionally
ignites someone else’s intention,
inspires someone to be themselves,
we might be able to get through this.

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internment itself
setting up camp
permanently.

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