“A simile is a rhetorical figure expressing comparison or likeness that directly compares two things through some connective word such as like, as, so, than, or a verb such as resembles.”
Slug is using a play on words to say the rap sheet he is proud of is the one with rhymes (and clever similes) on it, instead of his arrest records.

@Cafearius, that’s a bit of a stretch, check out what I and couple others wrote about the meaning behind the phrases of “reelin'”‘ in the years, stowin’ away the time."

The song, imho, is about a guy looking back on a relationship & judging his ex on how she felt about that time, or about how the listener in general, felt about the era being left behind, he asks her, or the listener, “are you reelin' in the years, stowin' away the time,” as the terms themselves are asking if you have captured the essence of the era & what it meant, taking hold of the experiences & lessons of life & “stowin' them away” rather than just letting the years toll by & attaching no particular meaning to them. To me he’s asking the ex-girlfriend or the listener in general if they’ve done that or have they allowed the years to just roll on by, attaching no particular meaning to them. If anyone could have lived the era as I did, and not have stowed anything away from the deep meaning of what transpired in general & in your own life, then they weren’t smokin' what I was smokin'! Lol.

“Reelin” refers both to attempting to physically pull in wasted time and to losing one’s balance in the weight of the years, realizing too late how much time has been spent on the wrong person.

The speaker is addressing a former lover as stated in verse 1.

The term “reeling” is rooted in the word reel which is a cylinder on which wire, thread, fishing line or film can be wound.

“Reelin' in the years” could imply the former lover has over the years reeled, drawn or wound someone or something to themselves.

The metaphor of someone fishing and reeling and pulling a fish out of the water is a persistent and unrelenting act that wears down a fish until it can no longer resist, which in turn kills the fish. The speaker in this piece may feel they have been reeled in for many years.

The speaker also mentions the former lover is “stowin away the time.” to stow means to pack something neatly or carefully – a deliberate act which indicates it will be used for a particular time. The metaphor may imply a lover staying in the relationship but is mentally and emotionally packed and prepared to leave when it suits their needs.

But the speaker is explicit as they use “Stowin Away the time?” – a Stow away is a person who conceals or hides on a vehicle with the intent to travel without paying. Does the speaker imply the former lover has been a stow away for the entirety of their relationship using the speakers resources and influence selfishly?

the next line “gathering up the tears” provides another complex metaphor. Tears can flow in times of conflict. Eventually, the tears dry up but the pain of the conflict can endure. The imagery of the former lover gathering up tears could imply the harboring of past conflicts and hurt feelings. The speaker asks the former lover if they have had enough of their tears too – implying both have been hurt in the relationship -

The speaker derides this person and their choices stating they could not recognize a diamond even if they were holding it implying they cannot tell the difference when they have something precious or worthwhile.

There is a dual meaning here. Partially referring back to the previous line, “something you think is gonna last”, since diamonds virtually last forever. Also referring to the value of diamonds, which are very expensive.

This first line makes an old reference to Shakespeare’s Sonnet 18: Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day? specifically line 9 – “thy eternal summer” – which is a metaphor for youth.

The speaker is talking in a derisive tone stating to someone that they are aging very quickly and they realize it.

This speaker points out the other person’s behavior as evidence of their realization of their fading youth as they “grab" something they believe is permanent or lasting.

To grab means to seize something quickly or even unscrupulously for selfish reasons or for self preservation.

The speaker feels this is a panicked attempt to stave off the other person’s realization and fear of their mortality.

A couple dictionaries say that “handle” is slang for total bets over a period of time, or on a particular sport event: “My bookie says her weekly handle dropped 30% after legalization.” So another way of hearing it is that you’ve got your handle — the total amount of money you can bet — in your hand.

I could definitely be wrong, but I thought that the “handle” was meant to allude to a briefcase, i.e. a briefcase full of all his money—that he was about to get chips for and ‘gamble away’.

Bro he says beg us like bagus

The wheel is the “wheel of life”, a part of ancient Buddhist doctrine: the six realms of karma represent the different types of cyclical suffering, “samsara”. The songwriters are talking about these “viscous cycles” that we get stuck in – the cycle of violence, the cycle of unhealthy relationships and, of course, the cycle of gambling addiction, which is also a stand-in for other types of addiction. Donald Fagen rented an Electric Sitar for Denny Diaz to play the guitar solo on this song; the sitar solo is a reference to the Buddhist roots of the lyrics.

The line about “firing” on the man who “stole your water,” bringing with it imagery of fire steaming away the water to nothing, adds to it the absurd meaningless of the whole song.