[Intro]

[Verse 1]
I sit so sad in this private jet lonely
I've got my Chihuahua and my African baby
They're my only friends
But they can't hear me

[Verse 2]
And in this night club
Everyone dances freely
Not me
I'm stuck in VIP with Tom Green
Sometimes it's hard being a celebrity

[Verse 3]
All the millions I make
All the supermodels I bone
Underneath this perfect smile
I'm a scared child looking for home

[Chorus 1]
It's hard to be me!
Can't you see?
I can't keep track of all these STDs
From Justin Bieber's parties
I'm a celebrity!
Plastic surgery
Has taken over me
Before my lipo
I looked like Kirstie Alley
Oh, can't you see?
I'm a celebrity
It's hard to be me
Ooh

[Verse 4]
People think I'm smart
By the big words I speak on TV
The truth is I can barely read
I don't even have my GED
You think I care about the big issues?
It's crap
Matter of fact
I couldn't point to Haiti on a map
Do they have a Four Seasons there?

[Chorus 2]
I am so gorgeous
Not a single flaw in sight
But the only untouched photo of me
Is the one after my DUI!
I don't eat meat
Joined Scientology
Got a sex tape that just made the TMZ
With Snooki!
I'm a celebrity
I feel so sick
Pinkberry I lick
I got sent to rehab with Andy Dick
It's hard to be me
I'm a celebrity

[Outro]
Ooh-oo-ooh I'm a celebrity
(I love cocaine!)
Ooh-oo-ooh I'm a celebrity
It's hard to be me (here we go)
Ooh-oo-ooh (do you know?)