How many afternoons have you wasted trying to convince your father that Cam'ron is actually a genius, only for him to cartoonishly thicken his middle eastern accent and object: “All he does is rhyme the same words with themselves!”?

IT’S CALLED A HOMOPHONE! IT CAN BE QUITE CLEVER! Also YOU’RE NOT MY REAL DAD! AND HERE ARE…

THE TOP 10 HOMOPHONE RHYMES OF ALL TIME

10. Kanye West on “Kinda Like a Big Deal”

Alligator soufflé, got it made Special Ed
Got head from a girl in special ed

Like George Costanza, Kanye fantasizes about the union of food and sex (George added TV). Here he enjoys alligator soufflé while a girl in special education (as Kanye says, “You know the one with the dumb ass, and she in the dumb class”) esses his dee. “Alligator soufflé” is a reference to the last line in Special Ed’s “I got it made”:

If what you got is greater I’ll trade
But maybe later cause my waiter made potato and alligator soufflé

9. Jay-Z on “Hello Brooklyn 2.0”

What up to the boy B.I
You know I handle B.I.

The first B.I. refers to Biggie, and the second to business. As is his wont, Jay-Z finds a technically interesting way to communicate the proposition “I am successful.”

8. Fabolous on “Salute”

I’m a rappin Ray Charles
I think I need a seeing eye dog
When it comes to being fly, dog
You ain’t seeing I, dog

With a simple substitution of an incorrect object pronoun for a correct one (“I” for “me”), Fabolous and his signature multisyllabic rhyme style (see the first verse of “Not Give a Fuck” for the canonical example) earn a place in the pantheon of great #8s on blog top ten lists (cf. Ben Stiller’s role as Steve Arlo in Zero Effect, the 8th best role of his career).

7. Jay-Z on “PSA II”

Puffing on a Cuban
I just put Cube in

Jay-Z relaxes by smoking a cigar and listening to an Ice Cube MP3/CD. Concise, evocative homophone, very nice. #golfclapforjayz

6. Cam'ron on “Rockin and Rollin”

But I love when hoes call me “The Cat’s Meow"
Cause I run up in them and I make their cats meow

He’s saying he loves when women praise him (“cat’s meow” is a phrase meaning something outstanding) for his sexual ability (he makes their pussies meow with pleasure)

More importantly though, isn’t “Cat’s Meow” something people said in the 20’s? Yes (so is “Cat’s Pajamas”). If you learn only one thing from reading Rap Genius, let it be this: Cam'ron contains multitudes.

5. Lil Wayne on “Ignorant Shit”

I ain’t recording, I’m just C-4'in, my currency foreign

As an artist, Lil Wayne is so different, such a Martian/goon, that it’d be more apt to describe his recording as C-4'in (exploding…C-4 is an explosive) than recording. And he’s spending foreign money (standard rap brag). Note the clever use of a partial word to fit the homophone — this kid’s going to grow up to be a very successful rapper one day.

4. Cam'ron on “Boy Boy”

Cat like you? Call you a gladiator
Give her oral and you happy: glad he ate her

Something tells me that in private, Cam demands that certain of his cleaner girls sit on his face and wiggle around. Lots of rappers eat pussy, and I suspect Cam is one of them, despite (/because of) his public disavowals.

I’m not a businessman
I’m a business, man

But Jay, a business is technically a businessman, legally speaking (corporations as persons is a huge legal meme). Also, this line was originally “I’m not an insurance salesman, I’m an insurance company, man”.

2. Notorious B.I.G. on “What’s Beef”

Beef is when I see you, guaranteed to be in I.C.U.

HOW HARD!? (I.C.U. = intensive care unit)

1. Cam'ron on “Family Ties”

From whippin' the bacon rolls to outside whippin' the bacon Rolls

Cam'ron has come a long way: from eating bacon rolls (cheap calories) to riding in a Rolls Royce of the same color. See some alternate explanations of this, the greatest homophone rhyme of all time.

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BONUS CONTENT!

Honorable mentions

Jay-Z on “Can’t Knock the Hustle”

We get together like a choir
To acquire what we desire

Cam'ron on “Family Ties”

From the back of the cop-ride
To black-on-black, black when we cop rides

(Don’t get what this means? See our explanation)

No-homos (not quite homophones)

Cam'ron on “Harlem Streets”

Nah, I ain’t gonna be embedded in jail
Talking to a cellmate in a bed in a jail, dog

Cam'ron on “Killa Cam”

You a rooster nigga
This a roaster, bitch
And I roast ya bitch

(Explanation)

Kanye West on “Maybach Music Part 2”

If B.I. was alive, he’d of probably had a two-tone
With the Grey Poupon
Anything ‘Ye poop on
Will explode*…

(*Reversible…i.e. anything ‘Ye explodes on will also poop)

Surely you had an exchange like this with your mother over the holidays:

Mom: I love your rap website and I’ve forwarded it to a bunch of my lawyer friends and they love it too!

You: Yeah?

Mom: But I have to say, I don’t approve of all the lyrics. Why do rappers talk about Al Qaeda like it’s a good thing!? It’s insulting! They’re terrorists!

You: (rolls eyes)

Mom: Also, what does “pop that pussy” mean?

Why do rappers identify with Al Qaeda, a gang of dark skinned, hood-rich criminal masterminds who pulled off the ultimate “fuck you” to white authority and social norms? Gee, I don’t know…hmmm…maybe because they’re gangsta-ass thugs!

No one has a hard time understanding why rappers valorize white mafia dons or latin/black drug kingpins. As an Arab American in a Brooks Brothers sweater, I think that’s racist

But that’s not the point. The market demands new content that’s more transgressive than what’s already out there. I mean, Lady Gaga can’t walk out of a hotel in anything less than a dress made of fleshlights and carrotcake, and she’s already sold 3 million records, so you do your own math on that one…

Rappers are similarly bled white trying to outshine and outthug the next rapper. 9/11 created insta-taboos, the likes of which human sexuality and other societal norms had taken eons to foster, so it merits little surprise that verses praising the Taliban result in some of the thuggest raps ever.

And now, without further “Abu” (Zubayda…get it?), we present you the Al Qaeda / Taliban rap paper plate awards:

Best original web series: “Al Qaeda Jada”, by Jadakiss

Never mind that Al Qaeda’s retrograde traditionalism is inimical to Jada’s baller lifestyle, never mind that the “Quaida/Jada” rhyme is only an accident of English phonology: Mr. Raspy decided to name his show “Al Qaeda Jada”

In episode 2, the crown jewel of this 4-part “Life and Times” style web series, Jadakiss:

1. makes a cop light his blunt (:58)
2. talks about the origins of his signature high-pitched laugh (AHAA!!!) (1:40)
3. gives us his “thoughts on the internet” (at 3:12…“gotta get your sites up, keep your blogs poppin…”)
4. talks Obama and McCain (at 6:04…“McCain is scary…his arms is all stuck…he need to get oiled up, AHAA!!!”)

Catchiest Taliban summer jam: “Rubberband Man”, by T.I.

(Ay, who I be?) Rubberband man, wild as the Taliban
9 in my right, 45 in my other hand
(Ay, Who I’m is?)
Call me “trouble” man
Always in trouble, man!
Worth a couple hundred grand
Chevys all colors, man

Remember that the rubberband “represents the struggle”

 

Lifetime achievement: Dipset

Following fellow “Dip” Colin Powell, the Diplomats are the rappers most dedicated to betraying America to Islamists:

 

Here are the top 5 Dipset Taliban lines, in reverse order:

5. Juelz Santana, from the song “I Love You”

I worship the late prophet
The great Muhammed Omar Atta
For his courage behind the wheel of the plane
Reminds me when I was dealin' the ‘caine

Back when Cam'ron and Juelz still made love to one another, they collaborated on a song called “I Love You”. This lyric praising the courage of Muhammad Atta (:41) got so much negative publicity — when the song was released as an untitled mixtape track — that the subsequent version on the “Diplomatic Immunity” album dropped the line altogether

4. Jim Jones in “We Built this City”

Aiyyo my Dipset Taliban, we on these streets
Like them wars on them streets of Afghanistan
Better yet, or Pakistan — and to America, Harlem’s Al Qaeda
Any problems I spray ya, not to startle the mayor
But in this 50 block radius, it’s “get the rock and shave the shit"
Or "get the Glock and blaze the shit”

You can imagine Bin Laden’s chagrin upon hearing this verse, when — to his surprise — he learned that “get the rock and shave the shit” refers to shaving coke, and not to fashioning a stone razor for a neckbeard edge up

3. Juelz Santana, from the song “Okay Okay”

A young Muhammad Atta
No plane lessons, cocaine lessons
Just a plot of towers

Before they crashed and divided the towers 
 I’m hurtin' working hard to reprovide the towers

We didn’t link the YouTube video because they bleep “Muhammad Atta”…which reminds me…MUHAMMAD ATTA MUHAMMAD ATTA MUHAMMAD ATTA MUHAMMAD ATTA MUHAMMAD ATTA MUHAMMAD ATTA MUHAMMAD ATTA MUHAMMAD ATTA MUHAMMAD ATTA MUHAMMAD ATTA MUHAMMAD ATTA MUHAMMAD ATTA MUHAMMAD ATTA MUHAMMAD ATTA MUHAMMAD ATTA MUHAMMAD ATTA — relax, I’m just ctrl-V-ing (a tru Islamist would’ve typed it out)

2. Un Casa, from the song “Un Casa”

Red when you see the cops
Got your wife sucking semen/cock
I’m a Taliban lyrical monster
They’ll shout the city I conquer
White ice cinnamon parka
Al Qaeda’s most vividest author

In the intro to his baller-ass debut track, Un Casa begs Cam'ron to let him be on the album. When Cam finally says yes, Casa proudly yells “Taliban Bitch!”

Casa’s raps are veritably Qur'anic. This comes at 2:49:

Al Qaeda’s most vividest author!

1. Jim Jones, from the song “The First”

Aiyo my Dip Set Taliban, we are not a crew
We’re more like a movement, more like in tuned with
The moon and the stars, some say I’ll soon be doomed for them bars
But I could be caught, pissy clubs, saloons and some bars
Industry think that they grooming a star nah
I’m more like a thug disproving the odds, run around my city all crazy
With my goons in some cars

Not really about the Taliban, but so good that it deserves the #1 spot anyway; the progression from the particular to the universal (crew —> movement —> moon and the stars) is soo hard…

Listen to the whole song you little Eichmanns!

Note: At a separate ceremony hosted by Maggie Gyllenhaal, we gave awards to the best technical production of Islamo-thug lines in rap, as well as an inaugural award for Best Actual Jihadi Rap (won by Dirty Kuffar)

The hook from Nas' “Ether”:

(I) fuck with your soul like ether
(Will) teach you, the king you know you
(Not) God’s son across the belly
(Lose) I prove you lost already

From time to time, believe it or not, Rap Geniuses actually disagree with each other! Things can get pretty emotional..

Here’s a recent example of a disagreement over lyrics. A few weeks ago, while reading our official take on “Ether”, I came across the explanation of the first line of the hook:

(I) fuck with your soul like ether

The author of that explanation, a certain Señor Hellrel, writes: “Evoking a potent anesthetic sounds cool until you realize it makes no sense.”

Just because there’s some meat to pick at doesn’t mean it doesn’t make sense, Hellrell. Nas is like the Torah of Rap: he requires a subtle exegesis.

As Hellrel notes elsewhere, Nas intersperses one of Jay-Z’s catch phrases, “I will not lose” into the hook.

Nas isn’t merely quoting Jay. He’s taking a famous Jay-Z line, inserting himself into it, and fundamentally altering its meaning until it belittles Jay, much like ether fumes would enter your body, alter your brain chemistry, and put you to sleep.

In effect, the structure of the hook mirrors the song’s theme: Nas can inhabit Jay-Z’s very words and contort them from within, Matrix style. Like a black Neo, Nas weaves himself into Jay’s lyrics, turning Jay against Jay.

And with that in mind…

Line 1: "(I) fuck with your soul like ether"

Recall it was Nas, in “New York State of Mind”, who pointed out that sleep is the cousin of death.

The phrase “vanish into the ether” is often used to describe a passing; more than a threat to put an ether-soaked rag over Jay’s mouth and nose in a drowsy old-school waterboard, Nas implies something far more sinister.

Line 2/3: "(Will) teach you, the king you know you / (Not) "God's Son" across the belly"

I group these two lines together because line 2 bleeds into line 3, but let’s tackle line 2 first. Here Nas is saying that he will teach Jay-Z (school him with his superior rap abilities, teach him not to fuck with him, etc.), then clarifies who will be doing the teaching (the King you know you [are] not). Listen to the way Nas says not with extra emphasis. It’s part of “I will not lose,” sure, but it’s also letting Jay-Z know that he is not the king. This is a direct rebuttal to Jay-Z’s “You niggas gonna learn how to respect the king” from “The Takeover”.

The “not” that bridges lines 2 and 3 both completes the thought that Jay-Z is not the king (you know you [are] not) and starts a new thought that points out that Jay-Z is also not God’s Son, which, by the way, happens to be tattooed across Nas' belly (imagine what this will look like on Nas' inevitable old-man-paunch). This drives home the point that Jay is not the king of New York, the Rap Game, or the Cosmos/Heavens.

Line 4: "(Lose) I prove you lost already"

Nas is telling Jay-Z to lose, then saying, “actually, you know what, I’m about to prove that you lost already.” It’s the weakest of the four lines for sure, but I don’t think it takes away from the overall brilliance of the hook.

So drink some purp or smoke something and give “Ether” a listen. It’s a little bit corny, sure. All of Nas is. But then again, what have YOU ever done?

Rap is like poetry, except good. So the Rap Genius University series is our effort to teach you some stuff that you zoned out for during that English class where the poems were about Nature, Love, and Regret instead of Money, Cash, and Hoes. First topic — Rhyme Types.

Perfect Rhyme

A perfect rhyme is one in which the endings of words sound exactly the same. Perfect rhyme is the most basic kind, and was the dominant form of rhyme in the early days of rap. Now it is one of a variety of rhyme types, but is still widely used because of the strong connection it creates in lyrics, as in this verse from T.I.’s “Rubberband Man”:

Tote a hundred grand
Cannon in the waistband

Assonance

In assonance, words don’t have the same ending, but they share a vowel sound. The consonants surrounding the vowel sound are different, but the shared vowel sound links the words. Assonance is the most common form of rhyme in rap today because its looseness opens up many rhyming possibilities. Here’s some assonance from Jay-Z on “A Star is Born” — notice how the rhymes at the end of the lines are imperfect but work because of the shared vowel sound of “ay”:

Wu-Tang gangbanged, Meth ate
Rae’ took on the date
with the Purple Tape
Passed on to Ason and then Ghostface

Bending Words

Bending words are a variant on assonance, in which a rapper “bends” a word (pronounces it in an odd way) to create a shared vowel sound between two words that, when pronounced normally, have similar — but slightly different — vowel sounds. This is a common technique among southern rappers, who naturally pronounce words in a way that sounds “odd” to the Northern ear. Take this verse from Lil Wayne off “I’m Blooded”, where he pronounces “thing” (in reference to repping Bloods) as “thang”, so it rhymes with “gang”:

Yeah, been around the world, rep the same thing
Been around the world, its the same gang

Alliteration

In alliteration, words begin with the same letter or sound. Alliteration is a subtler form of connection between words than some other forms of rhyme, but it is sonically evocative and musical. 2Pac was one of the pioneers of alliteration in rap, and he uses it to especially powerful effect by choosing hard sounds like “puh” and “kuh” and “buh” and “duh” to make him sound tough. Cam'ron, another artist whose flow is both musical and tough, often uses alliteration. Both 2Pac and Cam are masters of the subtle alliterative art:

From To Live & Die in L.A.:

Blind to a broken man’s dream, a hard lesson
Court cases keep me guessin'

From Killa Cam:

The hooligan in Houlihan's
Maneuverin’s nothin‘ new to me

Consonance

In consonance, words share the same consonant sound, but have different vowel sounds. Like alliteration, consonance is sonically evocative and musical. From Jay-Z’s “D'Evils”:

I’m trying to live it to the limit and love it a lot

Multisyllable Rhyme

A multisyllable rhyme is a rhyme that is more than one syllable long. Multisyllable rhymes can use any of the types of rhymes in conjunction with one another. Multisyllable rhymes are popular in rap today because they allow for a lot of creativity in making linkages in the lyrics. For example:

From Eminem’s guest verse on “Renegade”:

Maybe it’s hatred I spew, maybe it’s food for the spirit
Maybe it’s beautiful music I made for you to just cherish

From Kanye West’s “Through the Wire”:

The doctor said I had blood clots, but I ain’t Jamaican, man
Story on MTV and I ain’t tryin' to Make a Band

Now that you know all the major rhyme types, look out for the next post from Rap Genius University about Rhyme Schema.

Stay in school kids!

Jay-Z’s album The Blueprint was a baller achievement; XXL Magazine gave it a perfect XXL rating, The Source gave it 5 mics (also perfect), it sold 426,000 albums in its first week. But…funny thing; the album was released on the same day as this:

Needless to say, people weren’t talking about Jay’s album as much as they would have under normal circumstances. 9/11 changed everything (kind of a big deal). But as if Jay’s shine weren’t already being clouded, the song most people were talking about was “Renegade” and, when people talked about it, all they could talk about was how good Eminem’s rap was. Granted, Jay-Z’s verses were great as well, but the consensus is that – as Nas pointed out on “Ether” – “Eminem killed [Jay] on [his] own shit.”

Poor Jay-Z: he only had one guest featured on the entire album, and, when people weren’t talking about 9/11, they were mainly talking about the two verses on the album that weren’t his.

This does raise the question: was all the hype over Eminem’s verses justified? The verses are of high quality, no doubt. Very Eminemish, with internal rhymes and silly “white boy” phrases. The following 8 lines from his first verse show exemplary proficiency:

Now who’s the king of these rude, ludicrous, lucrative lyrics?
Who could inherit the title, put the youth in hysterics?
Using his music to steer it, sharing his views and his merits
But there’s a huge interference – they’re saying you shouldn’t hear it!
Maybe it’s hatred I spew, maybe it’s food for the spirit
Maybe it’s beautiful music I made for you to just cherish
But I’m debated, disputed, hated and viewed in America
As a motherfucking drug addict — like you didn’t experiment?

Classic Eminem, the verse concentrates on assonant rhyme; the end rhymes are unimpressive, but what you hear when he raps is the first and third syllables of each of ludicrous, lucrative, youth in hys, views and his, you to just…the lines are peppered with similar iterations of the “you” sound, creating a bomb ass flow (rude/spew/beautiful/disputed)

And he ends with a clever Oprah Winfrey maneuver:

And I got nothing to do but make you look stupid as parents
You fucking do-gooders, too bad you couldn’t do good at marriage!

According to the meme, Em put together his beautifully sculpted verses before Jay had written anything, thereby cowing Jay.

Although Eminem’s verses are certainly impressive, I would argue that the difference in quality between the two rappers' verses on the song is overstated. Each rapper’s verses reveal their different approaches towards rap and, in my opinion, Eminem’s verses (despite their brilliance) implicitly reveal his deficiencies as a rapper.

Jay’s flow isn’t as great, but a few of his lines show his ability to use metaphor and double-meaning to plumb the depths of language in a way Eminem cannot match. When Jay describes standing on the corner selling drugs as having a “pocket full of hope” or refers to his chosen path in life as going “straight” at the “fork in the road”, he illustrates the notion that rap is about more than rhyming; Jay’s voice doesn’t boom quite as Eminem’s does on this track, but his poetry is more intelligent.

And that, to me, is what separates Eminem and Jay-Z. When Eminem is at the top of his game, his genius is immediately apparent because it sounds great. But Em is usually incapable of employing double meaning: everything he’s ever said has meant exactly what it seemed to mean. He is the kind of rapper a mirthless analytical philosopher would have no problem appreciating. Jay-Z, on the other hand, is at his best when his lines require unpacking.

This is why our site has so many Jay songs and so few Eminem songs; it’s not that Eminem isn’t a brilliant rapper (and calm down! We’re trying to get his songs up, he’s a boss, we love him), it’s just that every time we try to add value by explaining what he’s saying, we find ourselves repeating the obvious.

For example, in one of my favorite lines ever, Em describes impregnating J-Lo on “I’m Back”:

As great as the passage is, other than mentioning that at the time Puff Daddy was dating J-Lo, there’s not much to add…“Well…he wants to have sex with Jennifer Lopez, you see, and he doesn’t want to use a condom…” No duh! Nobody wants to use a condom, you don’t need Rap Genius telling you that.

Perhaps Jay-Z anticipated people thinking Eminem is better in noting, at the very beginning of “Renegade” that his music requires more than just skimming; you have to actually listen closely to appreciate his genius.

Then again, Eminem sells more albums…)

At Rap Genius, we strongly feel that appropriate juridic delineation of “Fair Use” in the Intellectual Property context is the most pressing legal question of the day. Rap music — with its samples, mixtapes, and rich cultural trove — has helped to push the envelope of Fair Use jurisprudence time and again.

However, rappers' own ethical views on “fair” borrowings tend to be confused. Take Jay-Z: although he is one of the best rappers ever, he remains a polarizing figure, harangued by “hip-hop purists” for “biting” an absurd number of lines from the Notorious B.I.G.

Plagiarism? Allusion? You decide!

Nas first asked “how much of Biggie’s rhymes is gonna come out your fat lips?” on meme diss track “Ether”. The gravity of the charge is reflected in Jay’s numerous responses; he claimed to be just “bigging up [his] brother” on “What More Can I Say?” and claimed the right to use Biggie’s lines as defined memes of NYC culture on “Put On”.

As “Fair Use” doctrine would dictate, Jay-Z is at his best when his Biggie-bites are transformative:

Biggie starts his verse brilliantly on “World Is Filled”:

When the Rémy’s in the system
Ain’t no telling, “When I fuck em, will I diss em?"
That’s what these hoes yelling
I’m a pimp by blood, not relation
Y'all still chase ‘em, I replace 'em
Drunk off Dom…

On “I Just Wanna Love You”, Jay-Z copies these venerable words verbatim — but the change begins with the favored champagne brand and ultimately crescendos in a glorious bit of ringtone-rap karaoke imagery (and another allusion, this time to R&B singer Carl Thomas):

…Drunk off Crys, mommy on E
Can’t keep her little model-hands off me
And we’re both in the club singing off-key
“And I wish I never met her at all!”

Biggie also discovered the biblical-sounding “Sycamore”/“Sicker/More” homophone; on “You’re Nobody Till Somebody Kills You”:

With my sycamore style, more sicker than yours

Jay-Z artfully recontextualizes the homophone on “December 4th”, ironically giving the line a more original feel by making it a part of his own Story of Creation:

I was conceived by Gloria Carter and Adnis Reeves
Who made love under the sycamore tree
Which made me a more sicker MC (etc.)

Then, there are the borrowings that are more difficult to rationalize…

Biggie on “Kick in the Door”:

Your reign on the top was short like leprechauns
As I crush so-called Willies, thugs and rapper dons

Jay-Z on “The Ruler’s Back”:

Your reign on the top was shorter than leprechauns
You can’t fuck with Hov, what kind of X you on?

The minimal, non-transformative alterations don’t add any value to Biggie’s original; rather, they suspiciously serve to mask the line’s origin…

Biggie on “You’re Nobody Till Somebody Kills You” (Jay must really like this song!):

Stop your blood-clot crying
The kids, the dog, everybody dying, no lying

which Jay-Z bites unaltered on “D.O.A.”:

Stop your blood-clot crying
The kid, the dog, everybody dying, no lying

And so on and so on. Jay claims he’s honoring Biggie, but the untransformed, verbatim bites seem to stifle creativity; at times, he seems to use Biggie lines as filler, which is disrespectful to B.I.G. and Jay both.

In addition to the “artfully transformative”-factor, another worthwhile consideration in judging the merit of a bite is the recognizability of the line bitten: if Jay copies a well-known line, the claim of homage becomes more credible. If he were to quote a classic Biggie line — one that every white person in America knows, say, “It was all a dream, I used to read Word Up Magazine” or “I love it when you call me big poppa” then purists wouldn’t have a problem.

But he never does that…

One could contend that Jay is trying to draw attention to lesser-known jewels through his knock-offery. But an amateur rap audience is unlikely to catch the reference, tending to give Jay-Z credit for clever lines that are actually Biggie’s. To make matters worse, Jay-Z’s Biggie-bites are most often found in his radio-designed singles, which command a novice audience.

However, rap is an art form rich with allusion; the entire genre is built on the back of ‘70s R&B, funk and soul, and you don’t hear a peep of complaint out of them, now do you?

Every rapper steals! Cam'ron copies Jay lines; Kanye steals from Ghostface…it’s all in the game. In fact, rappers bite so many lyrics that XXL Magazine dedicates a section of each issue to calling “rhyme-biters”.

One can make the argument that rap — like China — is a space where plagiarism simply doesn’t exist; Jay-Z is respecting Biggie by interpolating the narratives, regardless of whether every suburbanite white kid who dances along to “I Just Wanna Luv U” appreciates the reference.

What’s more, Jay-Z has 11 #1 albums and has been consistently putting out great music since Reasonable Doubt was released in 1996…who cares if he stole a few Biggie lines here and there? He’s rich!

To quote Terrelle Pryor: “I mean, everyone kills people, murders people, steals from you, steals from me. Whatever.”

Thug life, welcome to the 21st Century. It wants to be free!

Observe…

Ghostface, from “All That I Got is You” (1996)

Fifteen of us in a 3-bedroom apartment
Roaches everywhere, cousins and aunts was there
Four in the bed, two at the foot, two at the head
I didn’t like to sleep with Jon-Jon, he peed the bed

Listen…it’s cued right up!

Kanye, from “Family Business” (2004)

Act like you ain’t took a bath with your cousins
Fit three in the bed, if it’s six of y'all
I’m talkin bout three by the head and three by the leg
But you ain’t have to tell my girl I used to pee in the bed

Cued right up again!!!

UPDATE: is this head-to-toe sleeping situation an undiscovered rap meme?

Beanie Siegel, from “Some How Some Way” (2002)

Our kids eating lunch at night
In their beds all bunched in tight
No less than three or four (you know how it go)
Two by the foot two by the headboard

Explaining Jay-Z’s “A Star is Born” was, for the most part, no problem at all. Everything he said was pretty straightforward and, once you know the history of rap, the references are fairly obvious. But there was one line that left everybody scratching his head:

Can’t you see how long my run
My reign, Lulu’s son shine

Presumably, Jay-Z was referring to himself as Lulu’s son. But this led to the natural question: who the hell is Lulu? Commenters who tried helping out with this one listed a few different theories, none of which made much sense.

Some said Lulu refers to Jay-Z’s mom, but Jay’s mom’s name is Gloria Carter

Others claimed it meant Lucifer and thus Jay-Z is calling himself the devil’s son. But while Jay-Z did have a song named “Lucifer,” there’s no evidence to think that Lulu is shorthand for Lucifer or that Jay-Z fancies himself the child of the devil

The most credible theory was that Jay-Z was referring to Lupe Fiasco. Jay-Z, after all, was the executive producer of Lupe’s album Food and Liquor and has been very complimentary of Lupe Fiasco in the past. Furthermore, Lupe had a song titled “Sunshine” on the album.

The pieces seemed to fit, but there were some concerns that kept us from pulling the trigger on this explanation: Jay-Z hasn’t collaborated on many songs with Lupe and it would be really weird to Jay to call himself Lupe Fiasco’s son, especially by using a diminutive nickname like “Lulu.”

Fortunately, we finally had a commenter give us a theory that seems right: Lulu is a character from the Roc-A-Fella Records film Paid in Full. In the movie, Lulu is a drug lord who introduces the protagonist, Ace, to the drug game. So it’s possible that Jay-Z is analogizing Lulu to whoever got Jay started in the drug game. We’ve even heard that Lulu was a character based on a person named Lulu in real life who actually introduced Jay-Z to the drug game. Confirming this has been difficult.

We’ve flagged both possibilities in the explanation, but if any of you out there actually know of this mythical Lulu gentleman, leave a comment and hopefully we’ll get to the bottom of this.

“Now first, you lick the belly button, and you have to lick it a real long time and get it desensitized. Then lick around the thighs…” – Antonio, “pimp” of my high school, on eating a pussy.

The first time I ate a choach it tasted fine, because my girl was vegan and all, but I didn’t enjoy myself because I was so nervous. I suffered from a lingering speech impediment and I worried that it would translate. Also the more typical worries — asphyxiation, the specter of sexual slavery, flashbacks of my birth.

But what worried me most was that I loved it. I loved the vaginal form up-close.

I found the sociocultural implications of my new passion harrowing — “is enjoying this beta?” I was 16 (a bit late on the train but that’s what happens when one is averse to fat girls and attends public school) and I had just discovered B.I.G. and Pac; all I could think was “a thug would never eat a pussy!”

Then I heard Big Pun.

“I’m Not a Player” was a revelation:

Split it in half, watch the gas, baby take a bath
Be good, I might put away the wood and give you the mustache

and:

Scuse me for bein' blunt, but I’ve been eatin' cunts since pimps was
Pushing pink Caddies with the fish tank pumps

I soon realized that Pun was mainly lauding his talent, not his zeal. On “Still Not A Player” he is a touch more agnostic:

I could go downstairs, little brown hairs everywhere
“You nasty Twin!” I don’t care
Round here they call me Big Pun, if you with the big guns
Thick tongue, known to make a chick [come]

Not all portly rappers are unequivocally in favor of a snack: in “I’ve Got a Story to Tell”, Notorious B.I.G. talks about eating pussy as an activity that his manliness wouldn’t allow him to take part in, even if he wished to:

Petiteness, but that ass fat
She got a body make a nigga wanna eat that…
I’m fuckin' wit you

But B.I.G. was probably fronting. “Another” begins with this real exchange between him and Lil Kim:

Biggie: You wasn’t saying that when you was sucking my dick.
Lil Kim: You wasn’t saying that when you was eating my pussy!

To be sure, some rappers cling to their machismo. J Cole doesn’t go down on girls because it’s woman’s work. On (aptly named) “Warm Up”:

Then they wanna seduce ya like Madusa, be cool
I said I got a girl, she told me, “Me too!”
So that must mean you want a nigga to eat that seafood
Baby don’t be foolish, but call her, I’ll watch her do it

On meme diss track “Ether”, Nas accuses Jay-Z of using oral sex to compensate for his face:

Foxy got you hot cause you kept your face in her puss
What you think, you getting girls now cause of your looks?

However, the Era of Weezy seems to have decided rappers' struggle over pussy-eating in favor of the pussy lovers. Lil Wayne is 5'6. As a goblin, he doesn’t have to worry as much about reproductive hierarchies…why do you think Katie Couric is smiling all big like that?

Some of Weezy’s pussy-appreciation is purely abstract; in “We Be Steady Mobbin'”:

You cannot reach me on my Samsung
I’m busy fucking the world and giving the universe my damn tongue

Weezy is speaking figuratively, describing what he will do to the womanized she-universe of the modern age. The phrase “give/take tongue” — a Wayne coinage — is artful and clean.

At other times, Weezy seems to prefer giving tongue to sex, which seems decadent:

You may not be a model but I can front page ya
You know I’m nasty, excuse my behavior
Let me just taste ya, we can fuck later

Some songs catch Wayne in more of a pussy-frenzy; from “Time for Us to Fuck”:

I say I’m on a strict diet, I can only eat you
Licky licky, licky licky; I like to
Licky licky, licky licky
(NOTE: this may be “lick it lick it”, hard to tell)

Unlike, say, me, Weezy doesn’t even insist on a bikini wax; from “Mr. Carter”:

I suck a pussy fuck a pussy eat it there
Long hair? Don’t even care!

Nor has the celebrity of the Contemporary Wayne put any damper on his pussy-eating zeal. The just-dropped “No Ceilings” mixtape has the inspired fuck-song “Wayne on me”:

The pussy lips smiling, I make the pussy happy
Take them panties off. The pussy looking at me
I’m the pussy monster, go get the pussy ready

I’ve heard that Lil Wayne kisses birdlips, and I know I can’t just model my masculinity off of a little Goblin fellow all willy-nilly, but one thing to keep in mind:

She kiss me mine, and I kiss hers back
If she a bad bitch, she deserve that…

Give, and ye shall receive, as the incorrect paraphrase of the Bible would have it. Girls are more generous with the generous.

And if it works for the Goblin, imagine what it could do for you…

Hey, lookin' pretty cosy there:

That’s Lil Wayne kissing Birdman, his adopted father (on the lips!)

Gillie da Kid, a former Cash Money rapper-turned-Wayne rival, took credit for leaking the photo in 2006 (we don’t believe him)

Weezy and Baby claimed they were kissing to celebrate their collabo album, Like Father Like Son, which was released a few weeks later. Although rappers are usually macho/homophobic, the kiss had surprisingly little effect on Wayne’s career: his rise to the top, culminating in the release of Tha Carter 3 in 2008, progressed unimpeded. After all, what’s wrong with kissing your daddy?

Birdman’s explanation:

Before I had a child, Wayne and all of them were my children, you heard me? Wayne to me is my son – my first-born son – and that’s what it do for me. That’s my life, that’s my love and that’s my thing. That’s my lil' son. I love him to death.

Cute, right? Not for some: Virginia’s finest hustlers, Malice and Pusha T of the Clipse, didn’t buy the fatherly love:

Interviewer: How do you feel about Lil Wayne saying he is the greatest rapper alive?

Malice: If you Wobble Dee Wobble Dee, you can’t be a legend.

Pusha T: You can’t kiss other men, you can’t wobble dee-wobble dee, and you can’t bite styles. You can’t bite everybody’s styles. You can’t try to rap like Jay-Z, dress like the Clipse, become a coke dealer after 5 albums, and now dress like Jim Jones. You can’t do all that and be a legend. You have to be a trendsetter and he ain’t setting any trends…the streets said he was biting the Clipse. Clipse never said he was biting us, because it didn’t really matter to us. It really don’t matter to us, we have real issues. Like Weezy fkin Baby (shakes head); come on man, he’s a faggot! (laughs)

The editors of Rap Genius, who love the Clipse, feel torn asunder…

But we don’t get emotional. Troof: the picture was taken a few years before it was released. Whether or not Gillie released it, as he claims, or it was Huff Po or Gawker or TMZ — or even Wayne himself — Weezy’s decision to embrace the kiss turned the splotch into a serious come-up.

It’s me, the rapper-eater
Feed me, feed me, feed me
Ahaha no homo

One time for me, one time for the DJ
He be Khaled, I be Lil' Weezy
Baby if you ask me, if your nasty
Creative, gifted bastards, spit sporadic
I’m so diplomatic/democratic
Touch it, bring it, push it systematic

Damn right, I kissed my Daddy
I think they pissed at how rich my Daddy is
And I’m his kid, I stunt with my Daddy
Call Ms Lee, she with my Daddy
So diss me, and don’t diss my Daddy
Cause who was there when no one wasn’t?
Just my Daddy! Who was there when I needed money?
Just my Daddy! So who be there when I see the money?
Just my Daddy! Who said that I’d be the one?
Just my Daddy! Hello Hip-Hop, I’m home
It’s your Daddy…

Me, me
It’s all about ME
If a girl got a voice then she talk bout ME (me)
He say, she say, I say ME…

And me, me
It’s all about ME
Play with me and it’s all our beef
Beef! Yes! Chest! Feet!
Tag! Bag! Blood! Sheets!
Yikes! Yeeks! Great! Scott!…

Boy, I don’t know what y'all bout
But I just spit like a dog mouth
Big ice been looking like a hog mouth
(Vroom!) I had to bring the hog out
Light them trees, bring a log out
Every day, Christmas, I’m egg-nogged out
And Hip-Hop is my new bought house
My flow just grew legs and walked out (bye)

That’s right, he kissed his Daddy! Chillax…

On the other hand — no homophobo — very few fathers kiss their sons on the lips (mine did…but it felt pretty gay)

But he’s Wayne ok? He’s the Poetic Genius of the Modern Age; he doesn’t even have a gender, much less an orientation. Wayne is a goblin: an alien of language existing in a sphere above class, above race, and — yes! — above gender (which explains the Whoopi Goldberg-lookalike situation…)